Our first face to face with our chosen social worker went really really well.
Sadly, I was quite sick and probably looked like a zombie on steroids! But the meeting itself was great!
Our social worker is someone who has a clear God given call upon her life, to do the work she does. It was so refreshing for Louise & I to see her heart, and how committed she is to those she serves.
Some of the advice, and their was plenty of really helpful stuff, was to be careful with sharing names and identifying details on social media. This may sound a bit restrictive, but its a good safeguard to have in place. When a child is placed and legally adopted, their have been cases where members of the biological family have later tried to make inappropriate contact. This can cause a whole load of unnecessary heartache! And so, going forward, I will not be mentioning our social workers (SW) name, or anything else that could later open up any possible problems.
Back to the interview/meeting; our SW started by sharing all about herself and her commitment, first to the children, then to all parties involved. This was peppered with some really practical advice about when and how to share with your child, that she or he is adopted. Things were shared, that when applied, can make such a patently challenging step, almost natural, and very much part of the family journey. I won't detail it all now, because I’m sure that, as I continue to blog, I'll be talking about how this is all working out with our child to be!
After the initial sharing, Louise and I shared a bit about ourselves, in particular how we feel open to a child of any gender. It's strange, some days I think a boy would be nice, other days a girl! If we were going to be blessed with a biological child, we would prefer not to know the gender until the baby is born. We’re going into this adoption with the same mind; we’ll wait to see what God blesses us with!
After much chat, we all turned to more of the business side of things. Our SW told us about how things work for the biological parents of adoptive children, the, what was aptly named, “the cooling off period”! Basically, that means a baby can’t be adopted before 60 days after birth, 90 days in some case, if there are issues with contacting the biological father.
Listening to some of what the biological mom’s have to go through, particularly if they became pregnant through no fault or choice of their own, was hard going. Louise and I felt heart sore for such women. Adoption is often a real hope story, but there is also often a lot of pain involved.
The business side of things included a walk through of the application form, possible expenses, and so on. Again, all really helpful.
There is a lot of work involved in the legal side of the adoption, much of which will be completed by our SW.
Our SW then spoke to us about preparing an “adoption profile book”. She showed us some examples from other parents of whom she has placed children with. This is something that biological parents can look at when they think about who, and what adoptive parents will be the best for their child's future. This book returns to the adoptive parents, and will be something that can later be added too, and then shared with the child in its future.
Coming to the close of the interview/meeting, we made it known to our SW that we want to proceed; she will send out the necessary application form and other documentation that needs to be completed by us.
This, I have to say looks somewhat daunting, as it involves parties outside of Louise and myself; parties that aren't known for being quick at what they do! Enough said on that – just pray please, that every party will do their bit in good time! We know that God’s timing is perfect, and He will bring things about perfectly!
Returning home, both Louise and I felt complete peace about proceeding with our SW, and obviously, with going forward with adoption. We discussed what kind of age group best suits us, the age of the child that is. We agreed that birth to 1 year old would be right.
Don’t laugh, but we’ve even started talking baby names!!
I'll post more, if I remember other details, and if not; when I have more news!
Thanks for following us on our journey!
