Porn!

When I was a young man, to find my dad’s stash of girly mags was almost the pinnacle of my hormone driven life! I remember how a porn mag would do the rounds in my ‘all boys’ school’. I think most young adolescent guys go through such a period in their lives. Many grow out of it; many become addicted to porn and go on to struggle with it in much the same way as a drug addict struggles with substance abuse.

I've had my own nightmare struggles with porn over the years. I grow up in a household that wasn't committed to following Jesus; it wasn't a completely lawless upbringing, but as a growing young man my brother and I shared a porn movie from time to time with my dad. Maybe that was for us, the ‘birds and the bees talk!!’ Problem is, that started things of for me, and as most men know, with such foundations in place, it can often be a real struggle to stay away from porn. The good news for men, who've come from such a background, is that Jesus can change everything. He can tear down those bad foundations, and as we walk with Him, we can build new, solid foundations, that lead us into freedom from ALL kinds of addictions.

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Last night I watched an old episode of ‘Friends’, it was the one where Joey and Chandler somehow managed to get free porn on their TV. They watched it non-stop for days. It got to the point where their view of reality was completely out-of-whack!

‘Joey had received a home delivery pizza from a woman who hadn't come in and had amazing sex with him!’

Clearly, in the porn Joey was watching, that sort of thing happened all the time! 

You know, that’s one of the many problems with porn – you watch this stuff and see such free sex, and after a while you start to see life through the movies. You start to think that that’s the way real life is!

BUT ITS ALL LIES!

Life isn't like the fictional scenarios seen in these movies! Anyone living life with this warped reality needs a serious reality check!

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Why do these TV shows seem to feed the lie that things like porn are okay? Could it be that there portrayal of life is, in many ways, reflective of the world we live in today?

Actually, it was an old episode of ‘Friends’; maybe that’s a picture of what life was like back then. My own stories of porn use are also very OLD! The actual world we live in today has traveled down a long bad road, which has left my experiences, and probably the experiences of the fictional characters, Joey and Chandler well behind. Today porn is so readily available; you can even pick it up on a mobile phone! Gone are the days when newsagents would put the porn mags on the top shelf, away from boys like me – gone are the days when you would get that old VHS ‘blue movie’ and watch porn through a snowstorm of a picture! Today you can view porn on most, if not all mobile devices; on the Internet; via satellite TV and even on normal terrestrial television. There is a generation of boys and GIRLS who are growing up addicted to porn because they have such easy access to it; young adults growing up and entering society with a totally distorted view of sex, largely due to the rubbish they've been viewing.

I’m not pointing fingers at these young guys; I’m actually desperately concerned for them. I know how hard it is to keep away from porn – for these guys the battle is all the harder. We shouldn't judge them; we should show genuine concern for such young people.

Whilst I’m away with my thoughts let me also say this:

I know that some guys will probably read this and say that I’m being over the top – that porn, taken in moderation, is harmless!

I have at least two problems with that – firstly, addictions start with small doses but often spiral completely out of control, in time! And secondly, the women in these porn scenes are somebody’s daughter, somebody’s sister; I don’t have a daughter or a sister, but if I did, I wouldn't want her to be the center of someone’s porn fantasies!

We need to look at the big picture guys!

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So what can we do about the ever growing rise in porn addiction – well like all addictions, as I've indicated earlier; walking with Jesus means we can break them all. But there are many other things that we can do to help the next generation who are growing up with this stuff. We can openly talk about our own experiences with porn, we can show that it’s an industry that puts out fictional lies – it warps what is the real beauty of sex. We can put safeguard software on our computers; keep a check on what’s being viewed on phones and other mobile devices. Most importantly, we can be approachable to these guys. Teenagers, young adults aren't stupid; many of them know they have a problem with things like porn. As adults, fathers, mothers, we need to be approachable, so that this next generation have a place to turn to with such issues. A place where they can turn for the right support and the practical help they need to get free.

My ideas aren't all there is. I would encourage you to comment on this post with any practical ideas that you have; advice that may help someone break free from porn.

On a closing note to this post – I heard it said that Mike Bickle (an American pastor), was quoted as saying that this next generation has the potential to be the best ever; because even with the ever increasing alternatives to a life spent following Jesus out their today, many are saying no to such things, and are getting on-board with Jesus.

What a wonderful truth that is?

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Don’t forget to comment with your advice ideas!